Peculiar Reviewer

You've been waiting for those certain DVDs to complete your collection. You've offered your soul to distributors around. You've pleaded and asked .....why??? These classic movies have been stripped of their DVD existence. For $50 or so you can find them used on Amazon, from a lonely mother selling her VHS tapes on eBay, or at approximately 3:42am on television.   Drop Dead Fred  (1991) The best imaginary friend that one can have, and '80s star  Phoebe Cates did, for years. He'll be with you in the worst of times. True he does create the havoc that gets you in trouble with your detestable mother, but he always wears a fancy green suit, and has Robert Smith hair - so it's worth it. But a 5.2 rating on IMDB. Really? I'm willing to Drop Dead...Fred, for this to come out on DVD! Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!  (1965) "I don't beat clocks, just people! Wanna try me?" -Varla Before there was Death Proof , there were three v...

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury: the time has come for me to systematically bash a film. If you find my case to be fair, vote with me to remove  The Dictator from all movie rental facilities at once. An oppressive leader "risks" his life for his fictitious Republic of Wadiya to ensure that democracy will never reach it. Okay, so try to imagine what would happen if you combined all of Adam Sandler's worst movies. You know the ones like I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry , that make you want to burn your copy of The Wedding Singer and crawl back home to better comedians. At times, the facial expressions and childlike voice of Sacha Baron Cohen tend to mimic that of Adam Sandler. In those moments of despair, I glance at my His Girl Friday poster and pray to Howard Hawkes for an absolution. Brief cameos by comedian royalty like Garry Shandling and Fred Armisen offer relief, yet cannot save The Dictator from...

Fall 2012. A DiCaprio Christmas Day double-header. The return of a Master. Two gothimated (that's goth + animated) movies. Which will you choose? The screen awaits. The Master (September 14th) This is Paul Thomas Anderson 's first film since the 2007's knock-out film  There Will Be Blood . This also marks the return of Joaquin Phoenix in his first dramatic role since Two Lovers (2008), a film that no one saw. Of course, Philip Seymour Hoffman will master another performance. Django Unchained (December 25th) Quentin Tarantino directing Leonardo DiCaprio - will Di finally win an Oscar this time?! Or will the Academy wait until he's old and gray to recognize that he's the most talented actor since Marlon Brando. The film is inspired by 1960s spaghetti westerns.   The Great Gatsby (December 25th) Baz Luhrmann 's version of F. Scott Fitzgerald's beloved novel will no doubt be much different than the 1974 release starring Robert ...

Alert all lesbian werewolves immediately! There's going to be a big screen adaptation about them! Comb back that mane and polish your Thriller jacket for Jack & Diane . The film's premise is a love story about two girls who meet in New York City, where somewhere in there Diane's body starts to go through violent changes. The cast includes Juno Temple ( The Dark Knight Rises ) and Riley Keough ( The Runaways ), who also happens to be the King's granddaughter. Elvis, not King Tut. Aussie pop sensation Kylie Minogue  makes an appearance as a lesbian tattoo shop owner. Jack & Diane were originally to be played by Ellen Page and Olivia Thirlby, however Juno fame proved too great for a lesbian horror story. The official theatrical release date is November 2nd, but you can catch it On Demand September 27th. Love is a monster, not a battlefield.

Have you heard about the upcoming series Mockingbird Lane ? Use The Munsters theme song as your ring tone? Just me? Well, the beloved, yet short-lived classic 1960s television show The Munsters is getting a fresh face on NBC next year. It is currently being developed by  Pushing Daisies creator Bryan Fuller , which means we can rest-in-peace-assured it will at the least be visually stunning. Portia de Rossi ( Arrested Development , Ally McBeal ) was given the quirky role of vamp-mama Lily Munster, after Mariana Klaveno dropped out due to a contract conflict. Jerry O'Connell ( Stand By Me , Scream 2 ) will play the clumsy Herman Munster, and the brilliant Eddie Izzard will embody Grandpa. My DRAG-U-LA was all revved up for this remake, but after learning that this family will don the non-monster look, my engine blew on Maple Street. Do this cult series justice or Marilyn is sure to haunt you for the next fifty years...