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Showing posts from September, 2012

Classic Movies Not on DVD

You've been waiting for those certain DVDs to complete your collection. You've offered your soul to distributors around. You've pleaded and asked .....why??? These classic movies have been stripped of their DVD existence. For $50 or so you can find them used on Amazon, from a lonely mother selling her VHS tapes on eBay, or at approximately 3:42am on television.   Drop Dead Fred  (1991) The best imaginary friend that one can have, and '80s star  Phoebe Cates did, for years. He'll be with you in the worst of times. True he does create the havoc that gets you in trouble with your detestable mother, but he always wears a fancy green suit, and has Robert Smith hair - so it's worth it. But a 5.2 rating on IMDB. Really? I'm willing to Drop Dead...Fred, for this to come out on DVD! Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!  (1965) "I don't beat clocks, just people! Wanna try me?" -Varla Before there was Death Proof , there were three voluptuo

People Vote Against 'The Dictator'

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury: the time has come for me to systematically bash a film. If you find my case to be fair, vote with me to remove  The Dictator from all movie rental facilities at once. An oppressive leader "risks" his life for his fictitious Republic of Wadiya to ensure that democracy will never reach it. Okay, so try to imagine what would happen if you combined all of Adam Sandler's worst movies. You know the ones like I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry , that make you want to burn your copy of The Wedding Singer and crawl back home to better comedians. At times, the facial expressions and childlike voice of Sacha Baron Cohen tend to mimic that of Adam Sandler. In those moments of despair, I glance at my His Girl Friday poster and pray to Howard Hawkes for an absolution. Brief cameos by comedian royalty like Garry Shandling and Fred Armisen offer relief, yet cannot save The Dictator from its downward spiral to the rental drop-box. A comedy can ma